Comments for Language for You

Comment on Being an Au Pair in the United States: The Agency You Choose Matters by Mark Stoneman

Mark Stoneman — Sat, 24 Oct 2009 02:39:33 +0000

I’ve decided to close comments, since this thread is several months old, and now it is just attracting comments from people in the au pair business. Some are well intentioned, but I don’t want this blog to devolve into a bulletin board for business links, which is really what those comments were about.

Comment on Inspector Clouseau Learning English Pronunciation by Mrs T

Mrs T — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 20:38:26 +0000

Ha, ha, ha I adore Steve Martin; a consummate performer of stupidity if ever there was one.

Have you seen All of Me? He has great physical comedic skills too – always has me in stitches.

I used to have speech lessons; now I talk real posh like:))

Comment on Inspector Clouseau Learning English Pronunciation by Mark Stoneman

Mark Stoneman — Fri, 18 Sep 2009 23:53:36 +0000

It’s a comedy, not a real pronunciation class. It’s a continuation of the old Peter Sellers pronunciation gags in the Pink Panther series.

Comment on Inspector Clouseau Learning English Pronunciation by Jeff

Jeff — Fri, 18 Sep 2009 21:58:43 +0000

That’s the worst pronunciation lesson ever. Although humorous, I feel bad for anyone who’s ever had to go through a class that relies so much on the RAM method (Repeat After Me)

Comment on Inspector Clouseau Learning English Pronunciation by davisw

davisw — Thu, 17 Sep 2009 14:12:09 +0000

been a steve martin fan since he performed before a crowd of about 50 of us at FSU when he was just starting out

Comment on Is this a pronoun? by Tiffany

Tiffany — Wed, 16 Sep 2009 21:57:41 +0000

Indeed they may, but it’s troubling that someone hasn’t given it to them before this point (or that it didn’t stick when someone did). I would like to believe–though I know better–that most students begin college with an ability to communicate clearly in writing.

Comment on Common Mistakes in Student Papers by Anne

Anne — Tue, 08 Sep 2009 12:33:50 +0000

Parallel structures are a topic I focus on with my German EFL students, as this is a source of much confusion. Some German idioms translate into the same sort of structures in English, and others don’t.
Er sieht zwar, dass ich früher komme -> He sees that I come in earlier.
So they think they can continue:
Aber er möchte, dass ich noch früher komme -> He wants that I come in even earlier.

Comment on Language and Culture: The Way We Speak by Aluajala

Aluajala — Sun, 05 Jul 2009 17:17:20 +0000

I live in Moscow, Russia and yeah here speaking with people is really different then having a small-talk with people from US. Here if you approach someone with no question waiting in a store they would just not understand what do you want from them and even expect some hostile intentions from you. At the same time old people may sometimes talk to you but this is because they’re usually lonely don’t have anyone to talk to at all.

Comment on Being an Au Pair in the United States: The Agency You Choose Matters by Mark Stoneman

Mark Stoneman — Wed, 01 Jul 2009 03:07:02 +0000

Hi Adriana! It is interesting to hear you reflect on your experiences after you’ve had a chance to digest them.

Comment on Being an Au Pair in the United States: The Agency You Choose Matters by adriana

adriana — Wed, 01 Jul 2009 03:00:05 +0000

I see we have a lot of sides in this story, and Stoneman did a good job in pointing some problems au pairs face in the USA. As an ex Cultural Care Au Pair, I cannot help intervening in the debate and adding another side to the whole story.
I have to say my experience in the USA was a very nice one. It helped me a lot, I grew a lot as a person, I learned many things, my host family was a really good one and I think of them every day. However, I would be lying if I said I was completely happy about the program. With this I don’t mean to blame anybody, but I strongly believe things can be improved.
First of all, my worst disappointment was with the car. My host family told me I would probably drive, and then, when I got in the US, they did not let me drive at all. Having lived both in Brazil and Italy without a car, at first I did not mind. One thing they did not tell me, though, is how important it is to have a car in the United States. Depending on where you live, public transportation barely exists. I know most families do provide a car to their APs, but the point I am trying to make is that Cultural Care people here in Brazil should have made me aware of the importance of a car. If I knew beforehand, I would probably have thought twice.
Another thing nobody tells you before you arrive in the USA is that a 500 dollars scholarship for one year of English classes is almost nothing in Washington DC. That is also not very fair. Coming from Brazil, I really thought US$ 500 was a whole lot of money! And this is not only because I wanted to believe that: it is because Cultural Care people here in Brazil stressed this US$500 scholarship as if it was a very good deal.
The performance of my LCC was also a little disappointing. All the au pairs in my group felt she was not really there for us when we needed her. Personally, since I never had very big problems with my host family, I never needed her help, but I would have used some interesting information about cultural programs in DC, movie festivals, the day embassies are open to the public, cherry blossom, etc. In fact, you cannot assume host families will be interested in informing their au pairs about any cultural events. I was lucky I became friends with my host parents, but I could see most of the times host parents just want you to take care of their kids while they are away, and that is pretty much it (it is sad to say, but that can be true).
In fact, based on my experience as well as on my friends’, this thing of “cultural exchange” is definitely overrated by the program. Truth is most host families do not want to know anything about your country, they just want you to do the work they pay you to do (I remember that was the argument my host mom used all the time: it is part of your job to carry a cell phone with you, it is part of your job to clean the kitchen, etc etc). And, believe me, it is very frustrating to feel you are just an employee after all this “you will be a member of the family” propaganda. It is not the case of my host family, but if I think of it, in spite of our sort of open relationship, they didn’t ask me more than 5 questions about Brazil throughout the whole year I was there!
Finally, in defense of the program, I do understand it is hard to evaluate all the families and all the au pairs. On the one hand, I could see families who behaved very badly with the au pairs asking them to work very very long hours (after all, APs do not go to the USA looking for a full time job – specially if you consider the salary – but for a full time experience); on the other hand, I have seen APs who did not take the job very seriously (and considering the responsibilities of being a child care taker, it is understandable that families have concerns). Good and bad experiences are just part of this program – as of life in general, I guess. Still, if the program could do a better job sharing information both with host families (who should understand they are not just hiring a cheap childcare service) and with au pairs (who should know more about the program and life they are embarking into), I think some disappontment and frustration could be avoided.

Comment on Being an Au Pair in the United States: The Agency You Choose Matters by Mark Stoneman

Mark Stoneman — Tue, 02 Jun 2009 22:24:47 +0000

Thank you for your candor. If I understand you correctly, a potential for a conflict of interest in the coordinators still exists, but you believe there are structures in place to overcome any abuses. It sounds like your organization is doing due diligence. Question is, is that enough?

It seems to me that these structures depend on the au pair being very proactive, and having a fair amount of linguistic and cultural competence. Many I have met would meet these criteria, but others don’t yet possess the necessary skills, although, fortunately, they are at least in contact with others from their own country.

Comment on Being an Au Pair in the United States: The Agency You Choose Matters by Natalie

Natalie — Tue, 02 Jun 2009 20:05:13 +0000

Every host family and au pair is given an online account where they can find a variety of important and useful information including the contact name and number for their Local Childcare Coordinator and their manager, the Program Director as well as their Placement Manager. The online account also includes a fantastic program called InfoSource which basically provides an internal search engine for anything and everything related to the au pair program. We also have an entire team of Account Services Representatives available via our 800 # which is also listed on their contacts page and on all of our distributed materials. In addition, each host family and au pair is given a handbook at the beginning of their program term which is specifically designed for each of them which contains information on their resources and our process for addressing any concerns which may arise. The LCC incentive program includes a number of elements, but to address your specific question they receive compensation for new families that they bring on to the program, repeat families that remain with the program, and a servicing pay for the support they provide to all participants in their region throughout the year. In addition, they receive evaluations from their manager annually, they also receive evaluations bi-annually through our large-scale customer satisfaction survey, they also receive feedback on the end of year evaluations from their au pairs and host families, and we are routinely monitoring their compliance paperwork submissions and providing feedback and direction in this regard throughout the year. If there was a complaint regarding a compliance violation, the Program Director would investigate by speaking with all parties, clarifying the regulations, and making a determination regarding what the next action would need to be. This could vary from a mediation meeting with the LCC to a decision to remove a family, for example, from the program depending on the circumstances of that situation. A report by either a family or au pair would not have any negative repercussions. However, action will be taken to address the situation immediately as non-compliance is simply not an option on our program. This may cause some concern for an au pair who may be nervous about bringing this information forth, however, we will work with him/her and be sensitive to these concerns in how we approach the host family. It is important to note, however, that if an au pair ever feels that they are in an unsafe environment, and that includes an environment of intimidation following a concern brought to light, we will remove that au pair and make sure that he/she feels comfortable. I, again, offer myself as an additional resource while remaining confident that my colleagues in the Program Director role as well as their managers, the Directors of Customer Service, as well their managers and our Vice Presidents of Customer Service are available and eager to assist anyone needing their support. Staff members can be reached at 800.333.6056 from 9am – 5:30 pm in all time zones and on-call staff are available after hours for any emergencies.

Comment on Being an Au Pair in the United States: The Agency You Choose Matters by Mark Stoneman

Mark Stoneman — Tue, 02 Jun 2009 14:36:55 +0000

Your positive experiences with au pairs reflects the best of those I have heard about.

Your self-understanding of your role reflects Cultural Care’s stated policy, though I note that you recognize the fact that English is not always being spoken at home. Being sensitive to this fact and trying to compensate for it is crucial. The English classes aren’t enough, however, especially when only $500 is available for them.

Finally, I note that my questions about incentives and checks on the coordinator herself go unanswered. How do you balance the competing pressures of your marketing and coordinating duties?

Comment on Being an Au Pair in the United States: The Agency You Choose Matters by tracy cota

tracy cota — Tue, 02 Jun 2009 14:25:09 +0000

I am a Cultural Care Host Family. I am also a Local Childcare Coordinator for Cultural Care. I became a host family first because we needed childcare and liked the idea of having someone who would become part of our family. I became a coordinator after being on the program, having a great experience on the program and wanting to get involved. We have had an au pair from Romania, and our current au pair from Mexico is extending with us for another year.

From the standpoint of being a host family, I think au pairs have an opportunity to learn much more than the basics of American culture — manners and food. Our au pairs have traveled with us, gone to pumpkin patches, old fashioned Christmas tree lightings, attended my kids’ birthday parties, one even came to my grandfather’s funeral on her own accord. We took the Romanian au pair to Mexico, and the Mexican au pair to see the snow and to the Bahamas. Their families have both visited, and become part of our family, which has been a great side benefit. They both came here to experience an American family and to see the world, and I think we have given them that. They, in turn, have given my kids great care and love, and have been very reliable childcare providers. At the heart of it, the au pair program is a cultural exchange program. When both the au pair and host family honor this component, I think it can be an amazing experience for everyone.

From the standpoint of being a coordinator, all families who are accepted on to the program have to be U.S. citizens or greencard holders. My experience has been that every host family I come into contact with speaks English fluently. I do have families where one person may have come from another country originally, and they want the au pair to expose their children to their native language. In these cases, I always encourage them to be sure to provide outlets for the au pair to speak English. For example, speak only in the native language to the kids, and speak only English to the adults. And to be sure their au pair enrolls in an ESL class, if they want more English exposure. This has worked very well for them.

In my role as a coordinator, it is my job to support both the au pairs and the host families. We screen all host families before they come onboard the program, just as we screen all the au pairs. I conduct a detailed orientation with the host family before the au pair arrives, and also do one after the au pair is in the home so that we can go over the number of hours an au pair is allowed to work, time off, house rules, expectations and all the other things that need to be communicated so that both parties have the same set of expectations. When disputes arise, we have a mediation process that we use, which is designed to help the family and au pair work through their issues. If things can’t be worked out, an au pair has a right to go into transition — change families — just as a host family request a new au pair if there are issues that they don’t feel can be solved. It is a safety net that is in place for both the au pair and host family, and we always work out a solution with both sides in mind.

The information you have here about the au pair program has only one side of the story, and there are usually three sides to every story. Cultural Care has been bringing au pairs to the U.S. for more than 20 years now. And there are a lot of host families AND au pairs who have had great experiences with the au pair program, including me.

Comment on Being an Au Pair in the United States: The Agency You Choose Matters by Mark Stoneman

Mark Stoneman — Tue, 02 Jun 2009 05:00:40 +0000

It’s not every day that a Senior VP responds. I’m glad you made your contact info. available. Maybe someone will find it useful, and I will certainly pass it on, should I hear of any further problems. Meanwhile, I wrote you directly today, but I think the following questions bear emphasizing here.

One thing your lengthy comments don’t address is the incentives that your coordinators have and what checks there are on them. Also, how clear is it to host parents and au pairs what, if any, recourse they might have, if they feel their coordinator is unable to solve a problem? Is there anything regular set up and well publicized? Or can they only contact you? Finally, what does “properly investigate any allegations of compliance violations” mean? Would a report have negative repercussions for the au pair who made it?

Comment on Being an Au Pair in the United States: The Agency You Choose Matters by Natalie

Natalie — Mon, 01 Jun 2009 20:55:27 +0000

My name is Natalie Jordan and I am the Senior Vice President at Cultural Care Au Pair. As a member of the au pair community and employee of Cultural Care for the past 10 years, I wanted to provide some additional perspective and response to your piece and the comments that followed. We know that improving English is an important element of the experience of an au pair and will create a tremendous number of new opportunities for them upon their return home. What better way to improve this skill and completely immerse themselves in the American culture than to participate in a program like this? Each year, thousands of au pairs and host families come together as a part of the au pair program and have the opportunity to make a lasting impact on each other. I am proud to be a part of this program and, more specifically, to be a part of an agency that has been in business for over 20 years and is the largest in the U.S. It is important to know that all designated au pair sponsors are regulated by the U.S. Department of State and there are a large number of rules and regulations by which all sponsors must abide in order to remain in good standing and to continue operation. Among those regulations is that the primary language spoken in the host family home must be English. In addition, au pairs are not permitted to work more than 45 hours/week and no more than 10 hours/day. If a student in your class has indicated that these or any other rules are being violated for them or any of their friends, please urge them to speak with their program sponsor immediately so that it can be properly addressed. It is simply unacceptable for an au pair to be in a situation where any of the regulations or program policies are being violated. The Local Childcare Coordinator (LCC) is an integral part of the au pair program experience and can be an invaluable resource in providing guidance, support, and information. The LCCs work closely with a Program Director and, together, they make sure that all program participants are supported and all regulations are adhered to. The LCCs are there as a means of support to the au pair and the host family. We send surveys throughout the year to our program participants in order to gather feedback overall as well as with specific regard to the support the LCC has provided to all parties. You reference the description of the LCC role on our website and I think it’s important to highlight that of the four areas of focus, the last one on the list is marketing and the first three are about customer service, support, and compliance. If you or anyone else has any questions regarding any aspect of the program or the LCC role, please feel free to contact me directly. In addition, should you have any au pairs that share any concerns regarding their personal experience, I would be more than happy to speak with them as well and properly investigate any allegations of compliance violations. Thank you – Natalie Jordan, SVP, Cultural Care. 617.619.1159 / Natalie.Jordan@culturalcare.com

Comment on Being an Au Pair in the United States: The Agency You Choose Matters by Mark Stoneman

Mark Stoneman — Sat, 30 May 2009 22:20:43 +0000

Regarding my last question, there is Cultural Care's own advertisement on their web page looking for coordinators. The page shows how the coordinator will have competing priorities. It talks about being a diplomat and enforcing regulations, but it also makes the coordinator's marketing goals quite clear. What I'd really like to see is how they are paid, what incentivization there is.

Comment on Being an Au Pair in the United States: The Agency You Choose Matters by Mark Stoneman

Mark Stoneman — Sat, 30 May 2009 21:59:00 +0000

Glad to hear of your positive experience. I would be interested to know what region you are talking about. I’m in Washington, DC, where it is not clear to the students I’ve had what recourse they have through the organization, if their coordinator is negligent. It’s worth pointing out too, that you are speaking from the point of view of a host parent. Admittedly, that’s an important half of the equation, but only half.

Of course, not all the experiences are bad. It’s just that when I hear these stories, it has always turned out to be Cultural Care. That is quite different from saying that when it is Cultural Care, there is trouble (which I’m not), but it raises a red flag in my book.

One last thing: Having a stated policy that comports with U.S. visa regulations is one thing. Enforcing it within one’s staff is another. Have you any idea what checks on and incentives for the coordinator there are to do right by both sides? This is still unclear to me.

Comment on Being an Au Pair in the United States: The Agency You Choose Matters by Lara P

Lara P — Sat, 30 May 2009 21:40:06 +0000

This doesn’t really match what I have seen. I”m a host family with Cultural Care Au Pair, and host families are required to be US citizens (required supposedly for all agencies) – but also be speaking English in the home. It was checked by my LCC. Honestly, I’ve had great luck with Cultural Care. The local coordinator balances the needs of the host family, as well as the needs of the au pair. Now, I know the local contact can vary widely, and I may just be lucky based on where I live (all the coordinators for CCAP I have met around here are great) – esp. since all the horror stories I hear through my APs are usually from other agencies (AuPairCare most often, but not always)…However, any of the issues you list above are enough to bring to the agency and should prompt a FAST response from the local coordinator. AP’s and Host Families alike should check out all agencies – and just to defend my agency a bit… they have the same info on their page for both au pairs and host families (all the major agencies do!)….

Comment on Irregular Verbs by Mark Stoneman

Mark Stoneman — Sat, 25 Apr 2009 15:56:04 +0000

The most commonly used words in German are also irregular. My sense is that this is also the case in French. It makes sense, since the common verbs are those that everyone uses, whereas the bigger, more academic words can have rules imposed on them by grammarians.